Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Tropical Blunder


Never, ever leave a piece of fruit to watch your expensive photographic equipment.

A camera crew learned that lesson the hard way on the mean streets of Malmö, Sweden when they entrusted Japanese popstar Hideki Kaji with their gear. They were in the middle of filming the waif-ish, pineapple clad singer for a music video, when they stepped away to photograph their children.

Kaji, known for such gems as "Twinkle Twinkle Pointless Darling", was quickly robbed by 3 men (or was it four?!) who got away with the cameras.

Appropriately, the men beat the pineapple to a pulp.

(Click the fruit for the whole nutty story.)

Update: Dammit, I just went and did the absolute stupidest thing I could have done. I watched a couple Hideki Kaji videos on YouTube...and I liked them. So now I feel bad about his little pineapple teeth getting kicked in. Dammit.

23 comments:

Samsmama said...

There are just so many things wrong with this story, yet it is just so delicious at the same time.

I have no clue why he was dressed as a pineapple. But I like it. Why they all left him alone is so odd. But I like it. That he was beaten so badly he lost a filling is awful. But I like it.

And why I felt compelled to click on "or was it four", I don't know. But I fucking loved it.

Bev said...

Ok, the "was it four?" link MADE MY FREAKING DAY. Well done.

Unknown said...

me loves pineapple, maybe the robbers just wanted a lick and some cameras to document it.

garrito said...

I love pineapple, too, Mad S., and I'm not a violent person. But look at that photo. I want to hit that...man.

Thank you, Bev.

Samsmama: I'm just glad you were able to tear yourself away from the Hustler site to read this. And yeah, I've never enjoyed reading about somebody getting a filling knocked out. But I did this time.

Samsmama said...

Oh, touche, Garrito. Bringing another blog comment into the equation. Well played.

I'll admit, I got a little adicted to "youporn" for awhile there. Just sayin'.

jessica o said...

I vow to always click your links now, Garrito.

The only good pineapple is a crushed pineapple. Fucking weird fruit.

The four were probably cronies for Carmen Miranda, trying reunite her headdress.

Harmony said...

Wait...did they toss his fruity salad? If it's fruity...is it gay? And it's gay...was that a fucking hate crime? Those Bastards!!!

Harmony said...

Also, I couldn't get the song to play for Twinkle Twinkle my Pointless Darling...but from the title alone, it sounds awesome!

And that picture...scares the shit out of me.

jessica o said...

HAHA! Hate crime! And for the record, "Fucking weird fruit" was not alluding to the fruit's sexuality. Because I love all food, straight or gay.

garrito said...

Agh! You have discovered my one weakness, JO-JO. My kryptonite.

Carmen Miranda.

Carmen Miranda haunted my childhood. Well, not THE Carmen Miranda. Look at this photo for proof, to the right of the devishly handsome li'l dude. Notice how her eyes follow you wherever you go, whatever you're doing.

http://s621.photobucket.com/albums/tt298/garrito/?action=view&current=garrito_scary.jpg

Samsmama: youporn? Nope, never heard of it. Nuh-uh. No way, jose. Not this guy.

Harmony said...

LMAO Jessica O...I am an equal opportunity fruit eater too...no hate here!!

garrito said...

Sorry, Harmony, I didn't have the heart (or the stomach) to find the actual song, so I simply listed the album it comes from on AllMusic.

I just looked for the song on YouTube, but it's not there. I did find this, which I hate to admit I kinda like:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQMUS_D7HUc

And agreed, Ho JO, some of my favorite food is gay. Strawberries. Gay. Chicken Piccata with Capers. Gay. Pear Strata. Very gay.

jessica o said...

He's an Asian Gloria Estefan! I can see Hank Azaria dancing poolside in a thong now.

And, Garrito, what the hell were you dressed as that fateful Halloween? Frankenstein's ghost?

That picture of Carmen is almost as scary as the wood paneling.

garrito said...

Yeah, that's it...Frankenstein's ghost. Honestly, I have no recollection, other than the fact that that was unfortunately me under there.

As scary as the wood paneling was, it still didn't give me nightmares like Carmen. Of course, now I'm just going to have nightmares about Hank Azaria in a thong with a bowl of fruit on his head.

Samsmama said...

Taking a break from porn and thought I'd stop by.

That picture is terrifying. The eyes really do follow you...

I think most fruits are gay. Bananas and grapes in particular.

jessica o said...

tuna's gay

Samsmama said...

I think tuna is bi. Kielbasa is gay fo' sure.

Mary said...

Know how I know you're all gay? B/c you're arguing over which fruit is gay :)

garrito said...

I didn't even know tuna was a fruit!

Samsmama said...

What in the hell were you thinking? You can't LIKE the victim. Jee-zus! I thought you were smarter than that...

garrito said...

I know, I know. That's usually why the secondary bad guy eventually gets killed in a movie.

Unknown said...

"hit that" like "yeah, I'd hit that" lmfao.

garrito said...

Ha ha, Stacie. Nooooooooo..."hit that" like "bust up his face". You can stop laughing now.